I don't want to mess anything up while I'm young.
Good that you have that clear. Not mentruating because of too low body fat is anything but healthy. On the long run such a thing can ruin your period, makes it harder to get pregnant one day. You may have not decided yet, if you want to have kids at all, whcih life you wann live, but I think it's stupid to ruin one's options befor a real decision is made.
pretty depressed
I don't know if I need inspiration or what, but it's way harder than it used to be:(
Working out smartly is always good. It's proven, that it helps with depression and anxiety. Yet apart from working out you might consider that everything is harder now because a depressive episode has hit you pretty hard and you need professional help... I just wanna say that, before coming back to workout....
If I have motivational problems I like to join a group. Working out alone for years can be tough. I always try to make some of my training in a group. Long time it was climbing and cycling, now it's martial arts again. Just things I like to do.
I have a goal then and for that I get motivated also when I workout alone in the gym.
For you it might be tennis and track and field or something new?
I would like to ad that you might know already weight gain might a symptome of depression. Anyway.. as for us women loosing fat always happens on the plate and in the kitchen. Working out alone might not do it.